Many of us have got used to hate automobile stoppers already somewhere at genetic level. These motionless city monsters eat our time with appetite and ruthlessly break plans.  While the man's half of population assiduously searches for the rational decision of the problem, proud owners of "heel" on back glass авто have learnt for a long time already, standing in a stopper to be engaged in yoga, to paint nails, to read magazines and to learn foreign languages.
However few of us already have understood, that multi-coloured “Форды”, “Тойоты”, “Лексусы” and “биэмдаблю”, moving round us a dense stream, it is not simple cars, it are men! Stoppers – the most natural and greatest inhabitancy of males. The tired drivers in the conditions of road jams appear defenceless before modest (and not so) the maiden charm. They absolutely have no place to run, they have got, have got stuck, have muffled engines to be easily caught by us.
Thanks to shortage of road outcomes and a superficial knowledge of detours we have every chance to find the man of the dream. Within the limits of Cosmo-experiment I have tried the diversified and effective ways of autoacquaintances.
DAY 1
Anybody from my acquaintances did not wish to admit propensity to flirtation on highways. With excellently fair eyes of the girlfriend convinced me that on road they look exclusively at road, instead of on the parties and especially not in windows of the next cars.
– Well it is fine, got acquainted! - the first Tamara surrenders - Went with the girlfriend in the Tver area, tried to be guided intuitively, well and was lost!
– We it are able!
– Have stopped midnight "Volga", chock-full any смурными men, have addressed for the help, the driver has suggested to follow it, promised to take out to hotel.
– Has taken out?
– Has delivered! Has shouted from a window “to you here” – and on gases. I look from a window, I try to read an inscription on a building and silently I start to panic – a registry office!
– Jokers!
– Wait, it yet all history. In ten minutes near to us parks black “Тойота” with Moscow numbers. It leaves two young men, reach to лжегостиницы and are gone by loud laughter: probably, to send the lost Muscovites to an ancient registry office is such widespread local entertainment.
Unfortunate travellers have got acquainted, joint efforts have found local hotel and have spent not planned week-end in Tver. The novel does not happen, but Tamara had a pair of good friends and one cheerful history in a stock.
→ Experiment
Really, why not to take advantage of a method of my girlfriend? What can be more charming than the girl, the suffering easy form topographical кретинизма? The confused young person, обреченно inclined over a map of the city, causes affection and huge desire to help. Anyway, I very much on it counted.
Fortunately, I am not strong in cartography, and the deviation from a habitual route “the house – work – the house” is fraught with not planned excursion on a native city. One of these days I desperately and unsuccessfully tried to get out of Moscow blocked by militia for carrying out of the next march of health. Friendly employees of motor licensing and inspection department have answered my request for the help significant “Turn!”.
My lost look has fallen to the driver in the neighbourhood:
– Forgive, you will help me to get out from here on the World prospectus?
– Well to throw you here it will not turn out any more! - young man obviously happy with my offer parries to me in the answer.
In salon of its car sneezes, sniffs and greedy the unruly puppy black лабрадора which it becomes instant object of our conversation is interested in an event.
– And it was courageous – your request for the help.
– There was a desperate situation …
– That is the choice has fallen on me absolutely casually?
Here my number starts to move, and my interlocutor suggests to exchange phone numbers to focus me already on a movement course. During our way we had time to discuss any dog pleasures, colour of cars, a political situation to the USA, absence of the sea in Moscow and even the last “Шрека”.
– Here your prospectus … the World!
– I have already identified district, thanks!
– And where further?
– I go to parents for a city. And you?
– In the Sheremetyevo. Only, probably, on flight I will not be in time any more. Has played in Susanin.
In couple of days in my phone has lodged SMS: “the Luggage has departed to Puerto Rico. If you again is lost, more to anybody do not stick. At me is GPS”.
RULE Safely ask about the help. Be interested in the detour routes, the nearest turns and a site of refuellings. Deny assistance to you hardly who can, after all men so like to feel courageous saviours! And to thank for the helpful information it is possible the unostentatious invitation in cafe or number of phone.
| THE FACTS | According to the interrogation spent by German company Gewis, 64 % of women and 59 % of men of Germany in stoppers there and then catch at mobile phones and start to call to acquaintances. Thus automobile jams bring real benefit to mobile operators of Germany. About two millions inhabitants of the Great Britain communicate with companions on stoppers, and approximately 150 thousand future married couples have got acquainted on road.
On the Internet there are some sites specialising on automobile acquaintances. All interested persons can unpack a label with personal number and paste it on back glass of the авто. Having remembered your code, the motorist can find your profile and contacts in virtual space. |
DAY 2l
Girl-friend Tamara remained the unique girl who has broken silence. I have addressed for tactics and strategy to men.
– Same it is easy. You look at the driver, you smile, and all is ready!
– And more difficult something is available?
– Once I cut one girl in a stopper. Have stood with it in a dense stream of cars, have sworn, have exchanged "compliments". Then it became a pity, has apologised. And she stretches the cut-away to me. Took, has thrown in a glove compartment and has forgotten. Then after any time has found it, and it scented, smells as any sweets, has called!
– Also what?
– Anything at us has not developed. But all the same cut-aways is a theme!
→ Experiment
That here so to be scattered by cut-aways, I simply did not have boldness. Therefore I have found more graceful (or cowardly) a way.
The matter is that I work in city centre and I can not often find an empty seat for a parking. I should park in the second number, locking another's cars. As the decent person, I leave on glass of the car a leaf with number mobile if "prisoner" needs to get out urgently of my "captivity". This time I have decided to play the maiden forgetfulness and after the working day have left a card on lateral glass of the авто. Has almost come to the house and it was already ready to fix zero result, to recognise the total defeat as phone call from unfamiliar number is distributed, I answer:
– Greetings!
– Greetings …
– I at the left.
I turn a head.
– I from another am left, - repeats a voice.
I turn a head in other party. The girl smiles to me …!
– At the left, you speak?
– Already has passed forward. At you a phone number on glass, you in a course?
– Yes it is fine? How I could forget it there?!
– I again at the left.
I turn around. Notice, precisely to the left. I see the nice young man at the wheel праворукого the car.
– And again hello!
– Perhaps in cafe?
– And can, in restaurant? - I parry. - you even will not ask my name?
– Masha, at you it is written near to phone!
I have grown bolder so, that have agreed to sit with the stranger in the first comer of cafe. Behind sandwiches and cold tea we have very successfully waited a stopper. Since then some times called up. The general themes and interests yet have not revealed, difficult the motorist has got. In respect of dialogue all of us still stand in a stopper, however the method works, and I am assured, that yet time I "will forget" phone on car glass!
RULE Be on call. An exchange of cut-aways – quite civilised, cultural and этически the approved ritual. Instead of outvoicing a stream, dictating the phone number, simply stretch it the cut-away.
He hardly will guess, that this scented slice of a cardboard all this time waited for it. Or simply "casually" forget on glass of the car a leaf with own phone number. Only to write it it is necessary not the handle, and thick enough marker: that the future promised-rjazhenyj was not mistaken in uniform figure. Then you will tell to it about difficulties of a parking.
DAY 3
The letter from the girlfriend has come . Аленка repents of all road sins. “Once in the evening I went on poorly shined road on a summer residence to friends. Before me the black BMW with included back противотуманками moved. Only here the ill luck – a fog is not present, to overtake it is impossible, and light mercilessly blinds eyes. The mood was fervent: of type I am afraid of nobody. We approach on a traffic light, I rise near to it, I show, that have opened glass and politely I explain, that it is good to switch off all the same to it противотуманки. The man at first was surprised, has then apologised, and within the next fifteen minutes prayed for me to stop and get acquainted. Has not dared”.
→ Experiment
To tell fairly, this day to me had no time for experiments. I went on reception to the stomatologist and did not plan to make eyes, as at me shot in perfect other place. Following a stream, I have not had time to pass on green light. Has got stuck in the middle of a crossroads – neither there nor here. Suddenly the bi-pip is sideways distributed terrible “!”. My car blocks a way to the man in a black suit and its not less black "Audi". It obviously uses not standard lexicon, does not cease бибикать and twirls by an index finger at a temple in my address. As soon as joins green, I sharply press on gas.
On a following traffic light black "Audi" it appears directly near to me. The driver awards me dissatisfied прищуром, that allows to me an occasion to express. Gestures I ask it to lower glass.
– I see, you are happy with the act. Consider, it was pleasant to me to stand at a crossroads and to block with all a way? Probably, traffic lights work for you exclusively according to your desire!
In the answer reaches: “the Idiot!” I lift glass not to hear insults, and I feel in safety and silence. But the opponent starts to gesticulate actively suddenly. It becomes interesting. I respond.
– Give I will ask pardons?
– Ask.
– Forgive me.
– Угу.
– Badly left …
– Угу.
Stretches me the cut-away.
– Would tell, that is pleasant to get acquainted. But actually not so.
– Perhaps, somehow we will correct?
– Can be. Somehow.
– I will wait for a call.
I yet did not call. With road boors I do not drive friendship. And here what to do with покаявшимися road boors, I was not defined yet.
RULE Be the small road knave. Female style of driving repeatedly was exposed to the rigid criticism. But the modern girl is at the wheel fast, skilled, attentive and accurate. Therefore it is not necessary to offend and shine us to us in eyes a headlight! Do not hesitate to say safely to men that will help to improve a road situation, and it, quite probably, will change a situation in your private life.
DAY 4
In the day off I have collected at myself all girl-friends, including what long and persistently refused to help me with experiment carrying out. We were loaded by female structure into the car together with a portable brazier, a shish kebab, drinks and a food set. Having distributed to little girls of a jar with soap bubbles and bottles of children's strawberry champagne, I have put them before the fact:
– We go to get acquainted!
– With whom?
– With motorists!
– And with grandfathers on old "copecks" too?.
We have drawn the poster, having decorated with its spangles, labels and drawings. The poster said: “If you on“ Лексусе "," the Audi ”, the BMW or“ a Crysler ”, call 8903 …”
We lower glasses. We uncork a bottle with pink aerated water. We include music. Cautiously we leave a court yard. Having heard a favourite song by radio, we start to echo loudly. The maiden chorus in small "musical-casket" starts to rivet general attention. Having taken the helm, I hand over to the girlfriend a tube with the first call. We include loud communication.
– Greetings, little girls!
– Greetings! You by what car?
– And what right answer?
– Admit at once is better!
– "Mercedes". It was not in your list.
– It was not, because I do not love them! Сорри.
And Леля throws a tube!
– Леля, you that-o-o? - We amicably ache.
– Hey, we have a good time!
The second call. Remembering scandalous trick Лели, the tube is intercepted by Katya.
– Greetings! To you only from the listed list of cars to call it is possible?
– Хм … Like as yes!
– Even if from "Bentley" will call, at once will send?
– In a case from "Bentley" we are ready to think seriously.
– We on the BMW.
– It is pleasant to get acquainted! And you where?
– It is logical, that for you. The Poster behind.
I look in a rear-view mirror. I see two nice young men. Approvingly I nod to girlfriends.
– Where go? - Boys are interested.
– On picnic.
– It is possible with you?
We exchange glances. We did not count on such plot.
– We at first will call in to ourselves, and then to you, goes? - Interrupt our thoughts young men.
We inform them a place of carrying out of our picnic in full confidence, that anybody to us will not arrive. But in an hour the familiar BMW approaches, young men already three together (!) unload from a luggage carrier meat, coals, juice and sweets. In following days off they again have thrust upon shish kebabs. Give up we could not. Yes, if it is fair, and did not try!
RULE draw attention. Fearlessly appoint collective appointments and send air kisses to open windows of cars. Девичники on wheels for the present have not won a due recognition and universal distribution. And after all three-four beautiful girls in the car is a high concentration of pleasure, a positive and romantic possibilities. Only let calls and SMS accept girlfriends: you all the same should watch road and brake on red light!
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